Well, I haven't written for 5 days. I also haven't done any art. Not exactly what I had planned for this year.
This weekend, I was exhausted. Saturday, I got up, ate breakfast, and had a nap. Then in the afternoon, we went shopping in Palm Desert. Sunday, I got up. ate breakfast, did some cleaning, and then had my nap. By Sunday afternoon, physically I could have done some art but mentally I was still tired. On Monday, we had an eye vet appointment in Upland for Maggie, so that took most of the day and we had to celebrate the report on Maggie's eye. Yesterday, I subbed in a special education classroom and came home tired and late. Today, I subbed in a middle school and came home utterly annoyed and exhausted.
Now, the question really is: what was I expecting? I know subbing isn't easy -- I have to get up at 4:30 some days, students aren't always cooperative, and I will be on my feet all day. Is it realistic to expect myself to come home, do art, attend to my cats, and interact with hubby and friends? I want to believe it is, but I'm beginning to suspect that it's not.
What is the solution? I can't quit subbing since it's the source of our income and if I ever want a full-time teaching job, I have to keep in the 'business'. If I knew eBay was back, I could cut down on the subbing -- maybe to 3 days a week -- and sell the art to make up for the lost days. Unfortunately, I don't think eBay is doing well, at least for art. I have tired selling art online, in galleries, and at art shows and nothing works well. So, I'm stuck subbing which means I won't get a lot of art done.
The subbing assignment for tomorrow should be easy although it will be boring. (It's special education for the severely handicapped.) I should come home more relaxed and less tired than normal, so maybe -- just maybe -- I'll be able to do some art.
Okay, since I really only need 1-2 hours and the chickadee will be done, here's my goal for tomorrow: I will work on it for 1 hour.